All new this Lenten season

Apparently our Catholic brethren do not have enough to feel guilty about. The list of mortal sins has accordingly been updated:

After 1,500 years the Vatican has brought the seven deadly sins up to date by adding seven new ones for the age of globalization. The list, published yesterday in L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican newspaper, came as the Pope deplored the “decreasing sense of sin” in today’s “secularized world” and the falling numbers of Roman Catholics going to confession.

The new deadly sins include polluting, genetic engineering, being obscenely rich, drug dealing, abortion, pedophilia and causing social injustice.

Pedophilia wasn’t a mortal sin before? Hmmm. Anyway, there’s more:

“You offend God not only by stealing, blaspheming or coveting your neighbor’s wife, but also by ruining the environment, carrying out morally debatable scientific experiments, or allowing genetic manipulations which alter DNA or compromise embryos,” he said.

Bishop Girotti said that mortal sins also included taking or dealing in drugs, and social injustice which caused poverty or “the excessive accumulation of wealth by a few.”

Hopefully your local priest will get an update on which drugs are soul-killing substances and which are just venial. Also, you will probably need some guidelines as to how much wealth is too much. I’m guessing it’s “more than the homeless and less than the Vatican”. But what do I know? I’m a Baptist. I thought a mortal sin was one that got you killed until I was in junior high.


3 Responses

  1. You just wait, Dex, once I find my Inquisition Play set.

    It’s here somewhere…

    Yeah, I read this same article too and went great, I’m having trouble with the sins we’ve got now and they want to add new ones.

    Here’s my robe.

    But then I realized, wait a minute, the news report didn’t say anything about B16 adding new sins. Something was fishy.

    Ahh, good o’l stake. Now some matches and oil….

    Then: I found this via The Anchoress.

    We didn’t add any new sins; the Bishop was just explaining some things, because if we were to add “new” sins, I’d advise the Vatican to add watching pirated videos to the mix. How does one become the Vicar of Christ again?

    Anyways, back to where I was…

    Here hold this list.

  2. damn… now I’m going to have to stop getting rich from all the money I’ve been making dealing those genetically engineered abortion drugs…

  3. well, as long as you weren’t illegally dumping them, sean. because as we all know pollution has actually always been a mortal sin.

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